watercolors!

Note to self: People on Flickr who tag photos of actual rainbows with 'Gravity's Rainbow' have clearly not read Gravity's Rainbow.


Also, in a review of Slow Learner:

"Funny and wise enough to charm the gravity from a rainbow."
-Christopher Lehmann-Haupt

What the fuck does that even mean?

Watching

It was the time for revolution, but those of us who had prayed for it so long were the ones who could not tear ourselves away from the safety of our rooms to dig into the dirt and dust. We watched as our comrades were arrested and beaten and felt a sense of guilt, for their actions and because they were not ours. It was when the violence became real that we we no longer sure whose side we were on.

In the Snow and Other Things

It is far too cold to stay outside. You have retired indoors already, and turned on the light in the study. I can see it from where I'm standing in the yard, can see how the lamps are reflecting off the leather books, burnt orange and red and yellow, blurred in the window, melted, warm. And I with my boots and coat, standing under the dark trees. My breath shows in the air, disappears into falling snow, and I know that I have grown cold. That it is far too cold to stay.

On a Cake by Cake Basis

cake > Cake

also,

Case > case (unless case = 'of beer')

The Simulacrumb 2: Special Cupcake Edition

I thought that for this installment I would focus on cupcakes, since they are so delightfully delicious and probably one of the cutest looking things that you can eat (jellybeans are pretty darn cute, though not as tasty).
We'll start with Inedible Resembling Edible. First up we have a cookie jar that I almost bought once, and have regretted not buying ever since:























This tin disguises cookies to be better than they actually are.
Second, how great are these cupcake earrings? Because I am only half a girl, my first thought is that there should be more edible jewelery. And not those half ass candy necklaces. I would certainly wear more of it.






















Alright, enough of that. Let's get to stuff you can actually eat. Here we have a terrific example of Edible Resembling Inedible. I think this particular cupcake goes above and beyond any expectations I had for character portrayal in sweets.
























Cupcake cupcake cupcake starts with C. . . . !!

The best example of the simulacrumb I've seen in cupcakes though, goes to these two beautiful examples of Edible Resembling Alternative Edible. Someday I am going to make these. And I will feed them to all of you, my dear readers.
























Ice cream cupcake. It was so obvious. Amazing.
And of course, because we live in America:

















The sesame seeds are an especially nice touch, I think.

Putin' Around Moscow

This is so old, it's not news;

but I still think about it.

This picture is of Reagan andGorbachev hanging out in Moscow with some Russian tourists.  it is also, Skynews reports, a picture of Putin, then a KGB agent, pretending to be a tourist.  That's him on the left, with the camera.

Skynews:

In an interview, Mr Souza recounted being surprised at the "pointed" questions these supposed tourists asked the US leader.

They included searching enquiries on the state of human rights in the US.

The identity of the man on the left of the photo - complete with camera round his neck - was later revealed and "verified" to Mr Souza as none other than Mr Putin.

The planting of KGB officers as bystanders was a common practice in Soviet times.

A Russian politial analyst disputes this:

"Vladimir Putin was a major serving in Dresden and he wasn't important enough at that time to be brought to Moscow", said Andrey Piontkovsky.

Mr Putin served as a KGB officer in the East German city of Dresden.

http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/World-News/Russias-Vladimir-Putin-Snapped-In-Disguise-While-Working-As-KGB-Officer-During-Reagan-Visit/Article/200903315244360

Thai Tea

Chai Tea > Tai Chi

Agree or disagree?

The Simulacrumb: Installment 1

If you know me at all, then you know that I have a cultural fetish for the following:

A. Edible resembling inedible

B. Inedible resembling edible

C. Edible resembling alternative edible

My favorite instances of the simulacrumb usually fall under category C as evidenced by my enthusiasm for hamburger cakes:






















Happy Birthday Rupert. It's the best fucking cake ever.

As we know, for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. A cake that looks like meat? How about meat that looks like a cake?





















That's mashed potato frosting with ketchup details by the way.
Thanks This Is Why You're Fat, for this wonderful addition to my inventory.

The Madness Continues

Edit: After getting several inquiries as to the ownership status of this drawing, I am now officially receiving requests for commissioned WTC Dino pieces.

Postcard/Greeting Card - $5
Small, pen only - $10
Medium, crayon and watercolor - $25
Large, acrylics on canvas - $100-$200 (serious inquiries only)

Please e-mail requests to
smarkari at yahoo dot com

Nighttime Adventures.

In the Dead of Night

Today I drew a dinosaur when I should have been doing my homework.

Dear Cristina,

The other day I was really bored in Phonology and to relieve my boredom I started mathematically analyzing all the guys I've dated or been with. I made a big chart in chronological order with three categories: Looks, Personality/Charisma, Bedroom Skillz. I awarded a maximum of 10 points in each category and then tallied up the results to see who was closest to 30 points (thereby being the optimal boyfriend). xxxxx got 27 points, (I obviously didn't include flakiness in the personality breakdown). as did xxxxx, my friend who had the girlfriend when we slept together. They were tied for first, and they are both disasters. Third place was awarded to xxxxxx xxxxx, with 26 points. I may have been too generous awarding him 7 points in the Looks category. I'm guessing you would give him like, a 3/10. Amirite?
I realized my breakdown might not have been the best way to determine the optimal boyfriend, and decided that if I did it again, I would have to break down the personality section into several different categories like Brains, Humor, Street Smarts, Arts&Leisure Knowledge, and Kindness. But I don't know if I want to go through the trouble.

Love,
Sandra

Dear Sis,

I like your boyfriend breakdown, but why is it that people who score the highest always end up fucking us over the most? Like, is it because they're too good for us? Sometimes I feel that way. But then I'm like, no, fuck it, they have Hollywood personalities and huge egos and it's not about you, it's about them. That is where the breakdown is. Dude might be a bit boring and not as charming and spontaneous, but at least he gives a fuck and will fucking give a care and be excited to watch (TV Show) with you and buy you the special kind of chocolate that you like and does not disappear up his own ass and never call you again.

I am curious to know how xxxx xxxxxx scored on the boyfriend breakdown. Also, I thought xxxxx was an ok looking dude. I would not give him a 3. Maybe a 5.

Love,
Cristina